At 4:30 pm today, I crossed Christie Street near Barton Avenue.  When I got to the west side, the curb grabbed my right foot.  I crashed into the sidewalk!  I saw stars, but did not recognize any of them from the movies.

Someone called an ambulance.  I suffered a bump on my head and abrasions on my right hand.  The sidewalk suffered multiple fractures.  The paramedics took the sidewalk to the hospital.  It was admitted and is in stable condition.

Motive?  The curb said, “I’m tired of people walking over me!”

Police charged the curb with Assault Causing Bumpety Bump.  The curb will appear in court on June 31st.

Ontario’s neverending lockdowns are making me lonely.  I hope the bump grows into another head so I will have someone to talk to.