It follows, therefore, that the only true meaning of relief comes from receiving a million dollars and lots of sex.

*

Some peoples’ brains are collecting unemployment insurance.

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Is a psychiatrist talking to herself considered self-help?

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PHOTOCOPIER EXPELLED FOR PLAGIARISM

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“What do you call a brick with a high I.Q.?”
“What?”
“A brick.”

*

If an ear falls in the forest, and no one is around, do the trees hear it?

*

Does a knot sleep tight?

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Does the past have a past?

*

“Knock Knock”
“Who’s there?
“Opportunity.”
“Of course!  I should have known.”

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Eat a doctor a day and you won’t want any apples.

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“What’s the best way to beat the heat?”
“Use a snow club.”

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What does a window jump out of?

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“Can you think of any jokes about toilet paper?”
“No.”

(Portions of this blog were previously posted in a washing machine on Mars.  They are reposted here without detergent.)