Marriage From A Pessimistic Man’s Point of View

 

My wife wanted a dog.  I DID NOT WANT A DOG . . .
And so we got a dog.

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I was foolish when I got married.  I actually believed that I could win an argument!  How stupid was that?  I would have saved myself a lot of trouble if I had gone along and said,  “Yes dear.”

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War and Marriage

War, or armed conflict, has many rules set out by the Geneva Conventions.  Marriage has only one rule not written down anywhere:
Whatever she says.

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After several months of marriage, I realized that I was going to places I did not want to go to and doing things I did not want to do.  I remembered an old joke:
One man to another:  What did you do before you were married?
The other man:  Anything I wanted.

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I married for love, and it did not work out.  If I ever get married again, then it will be for money.

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When did my wife get promoted?  We were both Privates before the wedding.  Suddenly, my wife was a Five-Star General while I remained a Private.  When did that happen?

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They say sex can be a problem that leads to marriage breakdown.
Sex was never a problem in our marriage.  We never had any.

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They married and lived happily ever after.
What a fairy tale!

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About the Author

I am Minnie and Chic's son.