Not All About Halloween

 

    Trick or treat
Smell my feet
Give me something
Good to eat
We used to sing this as kids.  It occurred to me recently, “Why would anyone give me something good to eat after smelling my feet?”

*

“Why did the pumpkin cross the road?”
“Why?”
“To get smashed in a bar on the other side.”

*

Did The International Association of Dentists invent Halloween?

*

“How many pumpkins does it take to change a light bulb?”
“How many?”
“One hundred and two, but don’t ask me why?”

*

A pumpkin walked into a bar, and the bartender said, “How did you walk in here?  Pumpkins have no legs.”
And the pumpkin said, “Nothing is impossible in the imagination of that funnybone guy.”
“The who?” asked the bartender.
“The funnybone guy.  This is all taking place in his imagination.  He had me cross the road to get smashed at this bar.”
“And why do you want to get smashed?” asked the bartender.
And the pumpkin said, “I drink to forget that I can’t walk because I have no legs.”

*

“Knock.  Knock.”
“Who’s there?”
“A ghost.”
“A ghost who?”
“A ghost who does not have a punchline for this joke.”

*

“So, what can I get you?” asked the bartender.
“And the pumpkin said, “Bring me something good to eat.”
And the bartender said, “Okay, but first let me smell your feet.”
“But I have no legs,” said the pumpkin.
“That’s okay,” said the bartender, “I’ll use my imagination.”

*

HAPPY BOO!

 

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About the Author

I am Minnie and Chic's son.