Top Ten Reasons I Do Not Celebrate Valentine’s Day


10 – Cupid once missed, and the arrow hit my eye.


9 –  I am allergic to roses and chocolate.


8 – I do not believe in thunder.
“What has thunder got to do with Valentine’s Day?”
I don’t know.  I am still trying to figure that out.


7 – Climate change.


6 – Time does not exist; therefore, February 14th is an illusion.


5 – I am not vaccinated and have a healthy heart.


4 – I am no longer hot to trot.


3 – Cupid’s nudity offends me.


2 – Rather than going on them, I enjoy eating dates.


1 – I ran out of gifts for my right hand.



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About the Author

I am Minnie and Chic's son.