I am the Senior Imaginary Number at Einstein Equations Incorporated (EEI). My duties as the Senior Imaginary Number include facilitating the impossible and funnybone-technicianing. (A funnybone technician makes people not laugh.)
Before working at EEI, I worked at Perth Plungers Management & Repair (PPMR) as a doofus. My duties as a doofus included being stupid. But PPMR fired me because I was incompetent at being stupid.
I had a lot of fun working as a used flying-saucer salesman for Galaxy Used Saucers. I got paid for playing with Anti and uncle gravity. Strangely, though, most of my customers were from the Pentagon, and not outer space.
I had a brief stint working as a boat for a ship. I quit because I got tired of coming home wet.
One job smelled. I worked as a wart at the end of a witch’s nose. This job did not last. I went away when the witch rubbed her nose with a toad.
I once had a secure job as a lock for Mon Key. The job was engrossing and fastening, but I had to quit when my tumblers tumbled.
The best job I ever had happened while I was growing up. I worked for Dooless & Seemore. What fun doing less and seeing more! Unfortunately, Peter Pan, who owned the company, fired me because I could not physically remain a boy.
