You Know You Are Getting Old . . .

 

You know you are getting old when . . .

 

 – Everywhere you go, people tell you how good you look.

 

– You have aches and pains where body parts do not exist.

 

– You grow hair in your ears.

 

– Your point of view requires trifocals.

 

– You start thinking that wearing diapers is a good and practical idea.

 

– The noises you make while going to the bathroom are the same noises you made years ago while having sex.

 

– You need help from younger people with apps for your smartphone and computer.

 

– Getting up, whether lying or sitting, is such a chore.

 

– You get tired listening to your hair grow.

 

– The pleasures of defecation are greater than the pleasures of fornication.
(Stolen from Mark Twain)

 

– You get tired listening to your hair fall out.

 

– You forget to finish your–

 

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About the Author

I am Minnie and Chic's son.